Jeremy Corbyn is a nice man, but he simply cannot provide us with the leadership that wins elections.
Take immigration. Yes, Jeremy has stood up like no one else against racism and xenophobia, but our voters want immigration stopped. Sure, they’re riled up by all the lies from UKIP and the papers, but that’s democracy. Sorry.
Or benefit cuts. Of course they’re vicious and cruel, as Jeremy will never tire of pointing out. But they’re popular among our voters. Sure, it’s a cynical Tory divide-and-rule strategy – we all know that. But our voters want to bash scroungers. Whether they exist or not. You may not like it, but that’s democracy.
Then there’s privatisation. Jeremy would be the first to stand up and explain why nationalisation of the railways, utilities and energy companies would mean more investment, more accountability, better services, more jobs and lower prices. But our business donors would desert us. Nobody ever said democracy was fair. Sorry.
And there’s Trident. Of course Jeremy’s right to take the courageous stand that it’s a colossal waste of money that we can’t afford. And we could never use it. And the Americans control it. But our voters think we need it to stop Isis invading. Democracy means listening to the people. Sorry.
And take workers’ rights. Yes, Jeremy has been campaigning for them all his life. And we know what ‘flexible job market’ really means – low wages, zero-hours contracts, no pensions, no holidays, no rights, and so on. But, like Mitt Romney said, corporations are people too, and they vote with their money. It’s the twenty-first century, people. We have to be flexible.
Finally, consider human rights. We’ve all seen that picture of Jeremy being dragged away by the police at an anti-apartheid demo in the eighties. But the Tories and their newspapers have convinced our voters that ‘human rights’ means cushy treatment for terrorists. Look, if you have to argue with your voters, you’re losing. Sorry, but that’s democracy.
In short, then, Jeremy Corbyn is a nice man, but he is wholly incapable of the leadership required for us to copy Tory policies and win elections.
So we have to get rid of him.
Sorry. That’s democracy.