Calm down, dear!

The Daily Mail gets its knickers in a twist again.

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So, Mr Bond – at last we meet!

Sergei Lavrov: ‘So, Mr £350m, you wanted to talk to me about fake news?’

Boris Johnson: ‘Well, I, er, um, ah…’

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A Brexmas Carol

Oh little town of Brexit-in-the-Wold
How still we see thee lie,
Above thy smug and clueless sleep
The silent stars go by.
Yet in thy dark streets stinketh
A lasting stench of spite,
The lies and smears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight.

For Brexit’s born of Putin’s stain
And fake news by the pile,
While mortals sleep, the Alt-Right keep
Their troll-fest of racist bile.
Oh the right-wing media together
Proclaim the Brexit birth,
And praises sing to Trump the King
And eff you to peace on Earth.

How shamelessly, how viciously
The poisonous pact was signed,
So May imparts to British hearts
The bigotry of her kind.
No ear may hear the Devil’s tune
But in this world of spin,
Where meek souls can’t resist him still
The Farage enters in.

Oh spineless House of Westminster
Listen to us, we pray,
Cast out this crap and keep us in
The EU or we’ll all pay.
We hear the economic angels
The fearful tidings tell,
So vote for us, Remain with us
Or we’ll see you in Hell,
Oh vote for us, Remain with us
Or we’ll see you in Hell.

Merry Brexmas, everyone!

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